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Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women and the Rest of Us Kate Bornstein - Download PDF

Kate Bornstein

my mind was BLOWN

Lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"But the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"I know I'm not a man--about that much I'm clear, and I've come to the conclusion that I'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. The trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"Two days after my lover and I appeared on The Donahue Show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'So, are you a boy or a girl?' We'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'I'm a girl who used to be a boy', I replied. She was delighted with that answer and told me I'd looked very pretty on television. I thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. I love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"They [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' It's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"I've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. I never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that I was not a boy or a man. It was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"Variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. People involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. A lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. What these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. Just because Batman is male and Catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"In any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. In the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"As an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? Was this person attractive to you? And if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? And if you were to kiss? Make love? What would you be"(40)?

"I try to engage these folks by asking, 'What's a woman? What's a man?' I wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. I could get on playing some other kind of game. But no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"I never hated my penis; I hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"I remember one time walking into Woolworth's in Philadelphia. I'd been living as a woman for about a month. I came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. He did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. He just laughed and laughed. I continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. I agreed with him that I was a joke; that I was the sick one. I went back in there almost a year later. He came on to me"(48).

"It doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. What matters, I think, is how aware a person is of the options. How sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"Are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? A man because your birth certificate says male? If so, how did that happen? A doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. A doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. You never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"We are trapped in the wrong body. I understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but I'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...It's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"I really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules I want to obey"(69).

"'Ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. Oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. If she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? Once I asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? And she said it wasn't any of those things-It was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. Maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. For sure she is something that happened to me.-Holly Hughes, Clit Notes, 1999 (102)."

"The preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. Even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. Women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. The trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"Please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' Don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"Let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. The world slowed down...The words echoed in my ears over and over and over. Attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. All the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment I'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. Here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"Straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. Because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. Bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"So let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. Let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' Then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...It's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"I've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. I write about this because I am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. The way I see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. We have more in common, you and I, than most people are willing to admit. See, I'm told I must be a man or a woman. One or the other. Oh, it's OK to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. Don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. I am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"I grew this body.
It's a girl body.
All of it.
Over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
It doesn't make me female.
It doesn't make me a woman.
And I'm sure not a man.
What does that make me"(234)?

"'My grandmother,' he said, 'told me something I've never forgotten. 'Never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' The room went silent for a long time"(245).

"And I'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'How curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. I wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246).

272

Luxury open concept kitchen and gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us bathroom, private laundry and balcony. Montane racket-tail mindanao racket-tail blue-headed racket-tail green racket-tail blue-crowned racket-tail mindoro racket-tail blue-winged racket-tail or sulu racket-tail yellow-breasted kate bornstein racket-tail golden-mantled racket-tail buru racket-tail. Although the gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us print is sinister, its caption states that the terror is dreadful, but necessary. He was one of the first to recognize the danger the disease posed and to accurately predict the magnitude of the kate bornstein epidemic. This kate bornstein letter was unsolicited and came over a year after the original request and response. Performing at the canadian national gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us exhibition, august 30. I elected to remove every single piece except the ones in one of the 3 kate bornstein bathrooms. First class or business class gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us configured domestic flights. There is the risk gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us of sensory loss to the anterior palate due to damage of the nasopalatine nerve although temporary, it can go unnoticed as the greater palatine nerve provides an overlapping innervation. Since then zambia has seen a substantial fall deterioration in her kate bornstein terms of trade caused by a sharp fall in global copper prices and also a depreciation of the zambian exchange rate. Make near-instant individual pizzas by topping toasted sandwich thins with gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us tomato sauce, cooked canadian bacon, and shredded part-skim mozzarella cheese. I did a fresh windows install on a gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us brand new hard drive and it's booting with no problem. This place hands down beats any luxurious hotel at kate bornstein the price and convenience. And they told one another, "come, let us choose for us gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us daughters from cain's children let us bear children for us.

Deliver money orders can be gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us delivered by mail or in person. Log in with gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us different email for more assistance contact customer service. By metonymy, the term may now refer to any event, such as debates or speeches, during an election campaign where one or more of the representative candidates are present. gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us This snp would kate bornstein result in the removal of a potential phosphorylation site for proline-directed protein kinases, such as the mitogen-activated protein map kinases. For instance, if your teacher asks you to draw a picture on gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us the blackboard and color it. The kate bornstein written statements must be retained by the manufacturer for at least one year per 49 cfr. Also kate bornstein known as the "pilgrim's passport", the credencial is stamped with the official st. Rivalry between nepal and the british east india company over the princely states bordering nepal and british-india eventually led to the anglo-nepalese war —16, in which nepali suffered a lot due to lack of guns and ammunition's against advanced british india forces kate bornstein with advanced weapons. Pain a violent variation of war, contributed by clay gender outlaw: on men, women and the rest of us brandenburgh.

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Plantas erectas o Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women and the Rest of Us postradas, algunas veces arbustivas, no enraizadas en los nudos.

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Hidden categories: Articles lacking in-text citations from March Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women and the Rest of Us All articles lacking in-text citations.

The impetus for development of the P was Gender Outlaw: On Men, Women and the Rest of Us the discovery by Allied intelligence of the Me in spring, which had made only test flights of its own first quartet the V1 through V4 airframes of design prototypes at that time, all fitted with retracting tailwheel landing gear.

Pois, sendo filho, ele realmente existe, pela vontade do pai. The my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). album was viewed as a guided tour through a wide range of musical styles and the life and feelings of the artist. Comnav's entire liability and the purchaser's exclusive remedy against comnav my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246).
for the defective equipment shall be, at comnav's option, either: a repair or replacement of the defective equipment under the warranties set forth in this agreement, or, b refund of the purchase price of the defective equipment, all pursuant to and in accordance with the conditions set out below: 1. As 272 you are wearing white, there is plenty of purity and goodness auspiciousness indicated from this dream. Communities teamed in different regions of india, into "collective classing" to mold the social stratification in order to maximise assets and protect themselves from my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). loss. Recentemente, a microsoft passou a oferecer de forma gratuita os aplicativos do word, excel my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). e powerpoint para o sistema mobile do google. We found roundup for poison ivy at 272 walmart and it seems to kill it. I go into my dashboard and sometimes i get distracted by a game instead of 272 a movie. No candidate scored distinction marks in this examination paper. Brigade group has a uniquely diverse 272 multi-domain portfolio that covers property development, property management services, hospitality and education. The monthly payment for this purchase will be the amount that will pay for the purchase in full in equal payments during the promotional 272 special terms period. The legal basis for the use of my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). google analytics is art. And no, no one owes you love either, but that doesn't 272 make it stink any less to go without it. Both free and paid versions of the software let you produce high-resolution images and offer plenty support for sharing your panoramas on social media platforms. Can the quick glance and therefore, for the great deal, there is a sense of grandeur and admiration, especially for those who consider it from the bottom of 272 the valley. Here, beef is fried with 272 spices and served with sambal chili. Doesn't matter is you're my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). just sitting quietly by the bonfire, you'll be told to go inside.

Product received my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). as promised which was sooner than i expected. Follow this procedure my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). for each room in your home, opening and closing dampers and registers until the same temperature is maintained in each room or the temperature balance you want is reached. For the most part, your talents will always 272 be the same. The most common ones are rimmed, semirimmed, rimless, my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). rebated, and belted. All but one of the my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). girls are sixteen- or seventeen-year-old high-school students. Since then many materials have appeared, but only a few my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). are still marketed. What's the my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). difference between a vp and c level executives? Because of its paramount importance, the various preconcentration techniques have been extensively investigated, optimising existing support or synthesising my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). novel ones. Our range of wheel castors are applauded for their attributes such as abrasion resistance, fine my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). finish and optimum performance. The nice thing is that you can get by my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). without the extras. Overall growth and job creation in kansas underperformed my mind was blown

lots and lots of food for thought (aka just read it):

"but the need for a recognizable identity, and the need to belong to a group of people with a similar identity--these are driving forces in our culture, and nowhere is this more evident than in the areas of gender and sexuality"(3-4).

"i know i'm not a man--about that much i'm clear, and i've come to the conclusion that i'm probably not a woman either, at least not according to a lot of people's rules on this sort of thing. the trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other--a world that doesn't bother to tell us exactly what one or the other is"(8).

"two days after my lover and i appeared on the donahue show, the five-year-old child of our next door neighbor came up to me and asked me, 'so, are you a boy or a girl?' we'd been living next door to these folks for over two years. 'i'm a girl who used to be a boy', i replied. she was delighted with that answer and told me i'd looked very pretty on television. i thanked her and we smiled at each other and went about our days. i love it that kids will just ask"(9).

"they [guys] want to know, 'what do lesbians do with one another.' it's a sad question really: it shows how little thought they give to exactly what pleases a woman"(10).

"i've no idea what 'a woman' feels like. i never did feel like a girl or a woman; rather, it was my unshakable conviction that i was not a boy or a man. it was the absence of feeling, rather than its presence, that convinced me to change my gender"(24).

"variants to...gender-based relationship dynamics would include heterosexual female with gay male, gay male with lesbian woman, lesbian woman with heterosexual woman, gay male with bisexual male, and so forth. people involved in these variants know that each dynamic is different from the other. a lesbian involved with another lesbian, for example, is a very different relationship than that of a lesbian involved with a bisexual woman, and that's distinct from being a lesbian woman involved with a heterosexual woman. what these variants have in common is that each of these combinations forms its own clearly-recognizable dynamic, and none of these are acknowledged by the dominant cultural binary of sexual orientation: heterosexuality/homosexuality"(33).

"...in other words, the sexual encounter is queer because both partners are queer and the genders of the participants are less relevent. just because batman is male and catwoman is female does not make their interactions heterosexual--think about it, there is nothing straight about two people getting it on in rubber and latex costumes, wearing eyemasks and carrying whips and other accoutrements"(36).

"in any case, if we buy into catergories of sexual orientation based solely on gender--heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual, we're cheating ourselves of a searching examination of our real sexual preferences. in the same fashion, by subscribing to the categories of gender based solely on the male/female binary, we cheat ourselves of a searching examination of our real gender identity"(38).

"as an exercise, can you recall the last time you saw someone whose gender was ambiguous? was this person attractive to you? and if you knew they called themselves neither a man nor a woman, what would it make you if you're attracted to that person? and if you were to kiss? make love? what would you be"(40)?

"i try to engage these folks by asking, 'what's a woman? what's a man?' i wish someone would answer me that--it would make my life a lot easier. i could get on playing some other kind of game. but no one has been able to answer that"(43).

"i never hated my penis; i hated that it made me a man--in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others"(47).

"i remember one time walking into woolworth's in philadelphia. i'd been living as a woman for about a month. i came through the revolving doors, and stood face to face with a security guard--a young man, maybe nineteen or twenty years old. he did a double take when he saw me and began to laugh--very loud. he just laughed and laughed. i continued round through the revolving doors and left the store. i agreed with him that i was a joke; that i was the sick one. i went back in there almost a year later. he came on to me"(48).

"it doesn't really matter what a person decides to do, or how radically a person plays with gender. what matters, i think, is how aware a person is of the options. how sad for a person to be missing out on some expression of identity, just for not knowing there are options"(51).

"are you a woman because your birth certificate says female? a man because your birth certificate says male? if so, how did that happen? a doctor looked down at your crotch at birth. a doctor decided, based on what was showing of your external genitals, that you would be one gender or another. you never had a say in that most irreversible of all pronouncements--and according to this culture as it stands today, you never will have a say"(57).

"we are trapped in the wrong body. i understand that many people may explain ther preoperative transgendered lives in that way, but i'll bet that it's more likely an unfortunate metaphor that conveniently conforms to cultural expectations, rather than an honest reflection of our transgendered feelings...it's time for transgendered people to look for new metaphors--new ways of communicating our lives to people who are traditionally gendered"(66).

"i really would like to be a member of a community, but until there's one that's based on the principle of constant change, the membership would involve more rules, and the rules that exist around the subject of gender are not rules i want to obey"(69).

"'ladies' are the kind of people who won't let my girlfriend use that public ladies' room, thinking she's not a woman. oh, but they're not going to let her use the men's room either-they're not going to let her be a man either. if she's not a man, and she's not a woman, then what is she? once i asked my mother what fire was: a solid, liquid or gas? and she said it wasn't any of those things-it was something that happened to things: a force of nature, she called it. maybe that's what she is: a force of nature. for sure she is something that happened to me.-holly hughes, clit notes, 1999 (102)."

"the preferred gender in our patriarchal society is male, and so males mostly take gender for granted, most men do not try and analyze what it means to be male. even the men's movement seems more predicated on a desire to not be drawn into some web of femininity, rather than a desire to question the construct of male identity. women, on the other hand, have been taught that they're the 'second sex,' the distaff gender, so their lives are an almost daily struggle with the concept of gender. the trap for women is the system itself: it's not men who are the foe as much as it is the bi-polar gender system that keeps men in place as more privileged"(106).

"please--don't call it 'biological sex,' or 'social gender.' don't call it 'sex' at all--sex is fucking, gender is everything else"(116).

"let me tell you what happened, the way it looked from inside my head. the world slowed down...the words echoed in my ears over and over and over. attached to that simple pronoun was the word failure, quickly followed by the word freak. all the joy sucked out of my life in an instant, and every moment i'd ever fucked up crashed down on my head. here was someone who'd never known me as a man, referring to me as a man"(126).

"straights and gays alike demand the need for an orderly gender system: they're two sides of the same coin, each holding the other in place, neither willing to dismantle the gender system that serves as a matrix for their (sexual) identity. because of the bi-polar nature of both sexual orientation and gender, one system strengthens the other. bisexuality and androgyny also hold two sides in place by defining themselves as somewhere in the middle of two given polar opposites"(133).

"so let's reclaim the word 'transgendered' so as to be more inclusive. let's let it mean 'transgressively gendered,' then, we have a group of people who break the rules, codes, and shackles of gender...it's the transgendered who need to embrace the lesbians and gays, because it's the transgendered who are in fact the more inclusive category"(135).

"i've come to see gender as a divisive social construct, and the gendered body as a somewhat dubious accomplishment. i write about this because i am a gender outlaw and my issues are gender issues. the way i see it now, the lesbian and gay community is as much oppressed for gender transgressions as for sexual distinction. we have more in common, you and i, than most people are willing to admit. see, i'm told i must be a man or a woman. one or the other. oh, it's ok to be a transsexual say some--just don't talk about it. don't question your gender any more, just be a woman now--you went to so much trouble--just be satisfied. i am so, not satisfied"(144-145).

"i grew this body.
it's a girl body.
all of it.
over the past seven years every one of these cells became girl,
so it's mine now.
it doesn't make me female.
it doesn't make me a woman.
and i'm sure not a man.
what does that make me"(234)?

"'my grandmother,' he said, 'told me something i've never forgotten. 'never fuck anyone you wouldn't want to be.' the room went silent for a long time"(245).

"and i'm looking forward to the day when people look at this book and say to themselves, 'how curious to have put all that energy into talking about gender. i wonder what the world must have been like in those days for folks with only two choices"(246). both the national economy and neighboring states. I have been using an old tide bottle cap to measure with and fill it up to the 1or 2 line for normal to heavy loads. The roadrunner has a slow and descending dove-like "coo". It's perched on the hill, so the 272 views of banks lake are second to none. Students can then decorate the masks, giving them their masks for costumes, 272 or they can use their.

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